SOLD!

This is just classic:

Is this racist? I can't tell. At least they didn't assume he was a white guy, like Hadfield.

Winter Meetings!

From the Desk of the Commissioner:

Just a reminder that the winter meetings are six weeks from tomorrow--January 12th at Mohegan Sun, we have two rooms reserved for the night. Around New Years I'll send around a list of items and rules we need to discuss. I'll thinking that we all meet up upon arrival for a late lunch/early dinner and knock out the rule discussions and votes. Then we can get on with football watching, boozing and gamblin'. That Saturday will be the Divisional round of the playoffs with a 4:30pm game and a 8pm game. I can guarantee that if the Giants and Pats are still alive in that round, they will probably be playing in that primetime game which would be cool.

I Could Have Told You That

"Cambridge researchers are to assess whether technology could end up destroying human civilisation."

Umm, of course technology will end up killing us all! That's if a asteroid doesn't wipe us out first, it will definitely be the excess heat from all our technology causing the oceans to boil and destroy everything, or killer articifically intelligent robots. Terminator is a premonition, people!

From the first article: "The scientists said that to dismiss concerns of a potential robot uprising would be "dangerous"."

As in: we might all get killed by robots when they rise up, "dangerous?" Yeah, they will have metal arms and lazers!

This Should Be Fun...

The steroid ballot has arrived. This is an especially fun topic to debate as to how steroid use should affect a player's eligibility, but it's also sure to trigger nonsensical arguments and inconsistencies amongst the actual people who get to decide, the BBWAA, arguably the least intellectually curious cohort whose membership doesn't require a belief in alien spirits lurking the earth.

We're already off, with this gem:

"My view is these guys played and posted Hall-of-Fame-type numbers against the competition of their time. That will be my sole yardstick. If Major League Baseball took no action against a player during his career for alleged or suspected steroid/PED use, I'm not going to do so in assessing their career for the Hall of Fame,"

That's Bob Dutton from KC. Don't think to hard, Bob when you can just outsource your judgment and standards to some other entity that had a financial stake in being asleep at the switch.

Of course McGwire has been on the ballot for a while now and hasn't sniffed induction, so maybe the standard has already been established - in fact, McGwire's totals have gone down somewhat over the years. But you can't expect the BBWAA to maintain consistency over the 15 years these guys are eligible.

Curt Schilling belongs in the Hall, his career numbers are sick.

Edwin Jacks-Off!

-15.83. That was the total number of points amassed by Edwin Jackson in fantasy week 4. In his defense - or does this fact work in the complete opposite way - it took him two starts to be this bad.

He allowed 18 ER, and 25 baserunners in 6 and 1/3 innings. Which gives him an ERA higher than his own age (or close)!

CPL historians are providing early reports that this is the worst week in fantasy - and possibly real - baseball history, save for the time in 1902 when the White Sox had a one-legged midget get liquored up and throw 8 innings as a novelty act.

4/22/10

Daniel D(3:33:53PM): I'm sorry if you don't like the rough talk. Now strap on your bike helmet and peddle on over to your glass bubble home and curl up in your fucking Ewok sleeping bag and take a nap. And try not to suck your thumb

From the Chat Board, 4/12/10

Mike O(6:35:29PM): speaking of excrement, i just got back from my poodle walk. about a mile from my apartment, on asylum ave, i was drilled in the back with a waterballoon full of urine.
Mike O(6:35:37PM): great way to end the day.
Kevin H(6:41:34PM): Did someone actually throw a piss balloon at you??
Fenn(7:06:27PM): That's not funny; that's just dangerous.
Javier F(7:06:28PM): I imagine that if you are targeting people to hit with a water balloon a guy with a poodle is an obvious choice because you know he isn't going
to fight back
Fenn(7:07:37PM): Actually its pretty f*ckin hilarious. On Asylum? Was it some local street toughs?
Javier F(7:08:38PM): I never understood how you fill a water balloon with urine, i can guarantee if i tried i would just end up getting piss all over myself.
Mike O(7:10:44PM): it was a drive by, and not only was it thrown at me, but it connected with my upper right shoulder blade and covered me with urine. it was effing fould and i had to walk a mile back to the apt. shirtless, carrying a piss soaked shirt...
Javier F(7:11:48PM): Why didn't you just leave the shirt behind. You must have really liked that shirt
Kevin H(7:12:11PM): How do you do this if you are over the age of thirteen? The prospect of an epic failure of the type mentioned by Javier is enough to chase the idea out of anyone's mind
Nick T(7:12:35PM): WHen I was a kid I had a toy that you filled with water and then ou pumped the water into balloons. It was made to look like a detonator. That was in that hay-day when water guns were really bad-ass. I imagine oyu would need one of those for piss-balloons
Javier F(7:21:32PM): Classic episode of the Wire when they filled the water balloons with piss
Walter W(8:05:22PM): HK = CPL Mets
Javier F(8:27:21PM): There is no reason to talk shit about the Mets
Javier F(8:30:28PM): Has anyone watched any of How to Make it in America? I heard its pretty good
Nick T(8:39:58PM): i really don't like that lead actor from other things
Javier F(8:44:27PM): Thats odd he seems like you're type. Not enough of a bear for you?
Nick T(8:47:06PM): Could be
Nick T(8:48:45PM): Now ALbert Pujols, he's a bear! Man that guy can stick.
Kevin H(8:59:34PM): Rico, Fenn beating me this week doesn't take away your loss from last week
Nick T(9:04:55PM): No but your Goatee means you lose every week
Kevin H(9:31:41PM): Well played sir